Today has been one of those days where I just don’t want to exist. Dr. P was slightly assholish for the first time. He told me to look up ACT which, by the paper he showed me, looks like a combo of CBT and DBT. I seriously didn’t need that today.
I went grocery shopping which almost pushed me over the edge. At least it was pretty empty as it was only 9:30.
For some reason I wanted pancakes, so I bought the stuff to make them. But making them left me so exhausted that I couldn’t really enjoy them.
On the way home on the bus, I spotted a furniture store and got off there. I managed to order the platform for my bed using my broken Korean and a lot of pointing. Unfortunately I ordered the wrong size.
I came home and took a nap. I could barely get out of bed because I had spams in my lower back. And of course it was too late to go see Dr. K, the ortho.
The delivery people came and as I was trying to clear stuff out, I tripped on the bed frame and banged up my leg pretty damn well. I also did something to my left shoulder.
Now I sit here crying. I have no desire to even contemplate dinner. I’d go get a hamburger or something but walking three flights of steps again doesn’t seem like a really good idea.
I’m just so tired of all of this. I wish I had a magic wand to take it all away. And it looks like it’s going to rain the next couple of days. Just wonderful.
I’m going to take my meds now and hopefully sleep. Because I really am tired to the bone.
On preview, I don’t know how much weight I lost, but when I got up to go to the bathroom I just pulled my jeans down. I thought I had unbuttoned them when I took a nap. Nope. They just pull right down over my hips. And these are jeans that were slightly tight when I bought them in September. Not that I’m complaining about that or anything.
From Darkness to Light 