I’m nice in warm in bed, especially my toes. But the candy is in the fridge. And my tummy wants one (okay two).
I see the s word in my weather ticker. I don’t like the s word. And it’s officially freezing. I want to know what happened to summer. I feel jipped. And how is it almost the new year?
My stomach won. Signing off to get my exquisitely delicious candy.
I had planned to write a real entry, but I ended up working late. And two cats are tearing me to threads for dinner, so I better get going.
Pdoc not happy with rheumy’s prescription. Apparently Prozac and some zopidem is outside of the rheumy’s area.
I say BS.
I’m a bit out of it tonight. Just hope they play nice.
The blood work my rheumatologist did last week came back generally OK. My cholesterol is still a titch high, but I’m pretty sure it’s been that way for years. One of the side effects of the meds I took years ago was raising cholesterol and triglycerides.
He’s still confident that fibromyalgia is my problem. He has me on Ultram. Yay for pain management. I kept begging Dr. K for something for the pain. He told me to take Tylenol, which does nothing for me. I have the list to show to Dr. P if he wants to change any of his medications. In the week on these meds, everything has been OK. I’m not pain free. But I don’t feel like I need to get the lidocaine injections to manage. I tweak my left shoulder (probably putting up the lights) so Dr. K did an ultrasound guided injection. Sorry, I thought it was cool to watch the needle go in as I could see the ultrasound screen. He remarked the area must be very inflamed because the lidocaine went in so easily.
So as before, I’m mainly healthy, but fat. And I’m working on the fat part. I’m happy because the oranges from Jeju are in season. I’ve been eating those for breakfast, a regular lunch, and then a couple oranges for dinner (note, these are huge oranges).
I’ve been described as courageous. Somehow I never associated that word with myself. But, you know, maybe I am. It takes a lot of guts to move to the other side of the globe where you don’t speak the language.
People have said it’s courage to live through what I’ve lived through. No, I don’t think so. That was pure survival. I distinctly remember wanting to kill myself at 5. That’s not courage, that’s just trying to stay alive in madness. When asked about why I didn’t tell anyone, I didn’t know. And I felt super guilty that I didn’t tell. But I can see now it’s survival. The abuse would have gotten worse and I can only imagine the punishment.
So now I have a life of my own. My Christmas tree (small it may be) is up and so are the light. I’m still in the tunnel, but closer to the other side.
I don’t know what the rheumatologist gave me last Saturday. The tiredness is still there, but not the bone numbing fatigue from before. Or it could also be a coincidence.
That and I passed 500 posts and 100000 hits not to long ago.
I bought some chicken for dinner, but I think I’m just going to have an orange, chill out (I did play some Mario Kart) until Mythbusters comes one. Then I’ll find me a kitty to warm my feet and go to bed.
Well 501. My previous post was 500. And now I’m going to back to watching Einstein’s Universe (or whatever the Discovery channel program is called).
You know, the river in Egypt.
This pink pajama stuff is really throwing me for a loop. Fun flashbacks, panic attacks and all. I can’t write it down. I don’t know if it is because it was a part of a Christmas when I was still pretty young. I just don’t know.
I’ve tried to go back and do some art, but it just makes me panic more. Sadly, reading murder mysteries seems to calm me down. Maybe next weekend I’ll get up to Seoul. I can have them shipped, but there’s nothing like browsing in a bookstore.
I was going to write a blog post, but a recently shaved white cat is getting demanding. I didn’t get home until 9 and goodness forbid I didn’t feed her first. So before said cat meows her way out of her skin I better feed her. And to drive her point her home, she’s sitting on my hands.
How can I honestly be this tired. I skipped going to the doctor to sleep. I slept all day Sunday. And I do mean literally all day. The kitties stayed on/next to me. We were a nice warm bundle.
Here it is, 8 PM, and I’m ready to go to bed for the night. Even without meds, I don’t think I’ll have trouble sleeping. I want to pick up a bit (looks like a hurricane hit this place) but I can barely keep my eyes open.
From Darkness to Light 